I’ve wanted to do this for a long time.
Having written in the past and not published anything, just snippets with a picture or two, I finally decided I want to share. Only with the benefit of hindsight do I always find that whatever i’ve struggled with, thought, or felt, other people have been through, are going through or know someone who's currently going through something of the sort. I’m no therapist nor do I have any ‘real’ knowledge other than personal experience so forgive me if I portray things in a way that’s unexpected or incorrect. I just hope this can be a platform to help others, be it only one person, even if that person is me.
Why do we never speak about the way we feel and why do we compress issues so repetitively because we think we’re wrong or lesser than others? Why do we just assume that everyone around us knows better, or rather knows better for us. Surely we know what’s best for ourselves and we each have our intuition to steer us further on in our individual journeys, these stories that we’re writing.
This splurge of words is simply to say that we should never feel inferior to others. We should never take the words of others as definitive, and be afraid to stray from that which we’ve possibly been defined as, or worse how we’ve defined ourselves. Quite frankly, if you are not happy, what is the use of being trapped behind the walls that have been put up before you. Eventually you come to realize that what you want is in your own hands, and not in the hands of others. That wall that’s blocking you from fulfilling what you want to achieve has only been permitted to grow higher and higher because you’ve allowed it to. That’s when you realize that the ‘boundaries’ that have been set have been done so by you, not others. You then start to realize that your freedom is in your own hands and that only you can change the state you're in, only you can change your ideas, only you can be you, only you can knock down that wall.
Wanting to be a better, happier person is i’m sure what we all ultimately want. But who says that we can’t do that now? Our own *true* happiness can only be madefor us by us, all it takes is making a decision. It’s more important than most other responsibilities we feel we owe to the world and others. But what can be more powerful in creating better relationships, a better impact on others and a better world than being truly happy, and knowing that with hardship comes ease, stressing ‘with’, because this journey we’re on is ever-changing, and from one day to the next we come across different circumstances. ‘With’, because this journey we’re on is current, and how can we be happy later if we’re not happy now. ‘With’, because knowing that whatever happens is the best for us though we might not initially see it, and when we face difficulty we always get what we never expected,we always get better. ‘With’ because learning to appreciate and be thankful for the ease in times of hardship is a blessing.
Fluctuations of self-confidence and self-doubt are natural. But when that doubt hits we must still work through it. We should never believe we are not good enough, or that others are simply better or ‘it’s their thing’ so I (most important person in MY life) must shy away from what will make me happy.